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Alien Invasion

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Battlefield Earth

Battlefield Earth

List Price: $14.98
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Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Worst Movie Ever
Review: Worst Moveie Ever period.

What was John Travolta thinking?

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: It's not that bad.
Review: This movie has been bashed quite a lot, but I thought it was okay. The script did have some serious holes but I think the movie showed how a society could disintegrate when greed becomes an art. Replace Terl with G.W. Bush, Ashcroft as the fool and the oil industry as the Psychlo home world and the movie makes much more sense. If you want to know how the U.S. Government operates under Bush and his cronies, then watch this movie then it won’t seem so absurd anymore. You’ll understand Bush and the movie.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: GOOD LEADS BY TRAVOLTA AND WHITAKER, BARRY PEPPER RUINED IT
Review: 3 stars for this creative sci'fi fantasy,the plot is well-made and this movie got some of the worst reviews ever but those inbred critics should rethink that,the leads are cool but if Travolta did a inter gallastic dance this would get 5 stars and be called SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER IN SPACE.this is the just this critics appinion.take it for what it is.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: COULD HAVE BEEN BETTER...
Review: THIS FILM COULD HAVE BEEN BETTER, THERE ARE VERY FEW THINGS GOOD ABOUT THIS FILM, THE CAST FOR INSTENSE... I THOUGHT JOHN TRAVOLTA DID MARVOLOUS AS THE STAR AND THE VILLIAN, HIS SINISTER PRESENCE DOES QUITE WELL ALTHOUGH COULD HAVE BEEN EXPANDED BETTER, I LOVE BARRY PEPPER, HE IS AN ACTOR TO LOOK OUT FOR IN THE FUTURE, I LOVED HIM IN 61, AND IN THE RECENT 25TH HOUR. FOREST WHITIKER WAS GOOD AS THE PUSHED AROUND HENCHMAN, BELEIVE IT OR NOT THIS WAS THE FIRST FILM I SAW HIM IN... SAD HUH...ESPECIALLY FOR SUCH A GREAT ACTOR OF THE CRYING GAME AND THE RECENT PHONE BOOTH.BUT OVERALL... COULD HAVE BEEN THE NEXT STAR WARS... IF THEY TRIED HARDER... AND MADE IT LESS GRIM.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Move over Plan 9 from outer space there's a new turkey king
Review: Even Ed Wood could have produced something better than this lemon, The source material isn't exactly the most intellectual Sci Fi book the world has ever seen , but it hangs together better than this pile of rubbish. How anybody can take a big budget, talented actors and come up with something so patently ridiculous is anybody's guess. I suspect that Hollywood's rather patronising view that a couple of loud bangs and a spaceship or two is all it takes to satisfy a Science fiction film fan had a lot to do with it. Wrong guys try coming up with a logical plot line and three dimensional characters. Or is the possibility that we may actually be a lot more intelligent than you, rather too hard to handle ?

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Do you hate life? Watch this movie then!
Review: WORST MOVIE EVER!!!!!

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: This Turkey is Suitable for Thanksgiving
Review: This movie is not all bad; it's bad, really bad, but there are a few redeeming moments in it, enough that I squeaked out a second star (barely).

It's supposedly the year 3000, and "superior" aliens have pretty much conquered the Earth and are now stripping our planet's mineral wealth. As we find out during the movie, once the mineral wealth is gone, the evil aliens plan to exterminate the rest of mankind. If you think about it, this movie sounds like "Independence Day", after the aliens win. Except that "Independence Day", while over-the-top and unrealistic, is an Academy Award winner AND documentary-like compared to this turkey.

The Psychlos are the aliens that have conquered the Earth. The only problem is that these aliens are so dumb that you wonder how they ever conquered potty-training. Somehow these "superior" aliens have not realized that the man-animals once had a reasonably complex technologically-based society. Thus, when the man-animals have the opportunity to steal a few weapons and take out some of their captors, the Psychlos seem so surprised. Either the Psychlos have never run into a planet with any sort of technology, or their arrogance is greater than that of any human that has ever lived.

More evidence of alien stupidity: Forest Whitaker doesn't realize his boss is setting Forest up by secretly recording a meeting between the two of them. I guess the "advanced" aliens have never considered that someone might record them and use that recording for blackmail. John Travolta's childish explanation of the devious way in which he recorded the meeting for blackmail purposes will make you wish for a cheesy detective movie, partially as a substitute for this movie and partially to hope the detective will come pummel some aliens, particularly Travolta.

Even more alien stupidity: When John Travolta sets humans out to mine gold, they go get gold bars from Fort Knox instead. Their explanation to Travolta: We figured you wouldn't want it raw. I was starting to think this movie was a comedy this portion was so hilarious.

More stupidity: Given that the atmosphere of the alien planet reacts badly to nuclear weapons, you would think that step one in conquering a planet with nuclear weapons would be to safeguard your planet from those weapons. Didn't I say something about arrogance earlier?

Much of the movie, which drags on and on, is devoted to explaining how the down-trodden humans were able to put themselves in a position to challenge their alien masters. Of course we get to the end of the movie, if we are still awake, where the challenge between the aliens and humans occurs; we know what happens, the rest is just details.

At this point I'm reconsidering my two-star rating. First, this movie was boring beyond belief. Much of the movie is confusing. After a while the only reason I watched the whole thing was to give the movie every opportunity to redeem itself. The movie finally did get a bit interesting near the end, but by then I had moved onto my second point. Second, the acting was bad. The acting was very bad. When the acting was not bad, it was hammy and corny. The only person I can point to in this movie that did a halfway decent job of acting was Barry Pepper, who somehow managed to get through this movie retaining some measure of the esteem he gained from being in "Private Ryan".

You would think that the confused, boring story line and the bad acting would be enough to deep six this movie, and they are, but we can add to these two points plot holes large enough to fit the Titanic into, sideways; perhaps even TWO Titanics, sideways and end-to-end.

Didn't I say there were a couple of good points to this movie? The best point is the special effects of the ruined Earth. The special effects are phenomenal. They don't make up for the rest of the movie, but they are good. Also, Barry Pepper's acting managed to hang in there in spite of the disaster taking place around him.

This movie is such a turkey that a real turkey this size would feed Boston at Thanksgiving. "Plan 9 from Outer Space" move over, I think we have a new contender for the worst movie of all time.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Ack...
Review: It's a shame that Amazon doesn't have like -1000 or something, because that's about what this movie deserves.

Anyways, I can't believe that Hollywood actually lets stuff like this out. It should be buried on the moon in the vault they mention in 3001. There are some bad movies that have merit because there is some entertainment value in this. Sadly, this movie isn't one of them.

Where to start on this movie? I've seen some cheesy plots before, but this one takes the cake. It makes the Planet of the Apes bomb movie look like first rate cinema. Talk about a disjointed plot. Then there is the fantastic acting and dialogue. I could swear at around the halfway point, Forest Whittaker stopped taking the movie seriously. He was using every willpower bone in his body to not break out laughing. The sad part is that John Travolta was taking this movie seriously. Then there was the camerawork. Why did every scene with the Rasta Klingons have the camera tilted? I thought there was a problem with my TV or something. And the costuming. Was the costume guy rejected by Star Trek or something? These guys looked like Rastafarian Klingons.

Sad part is that I kept plowing through this movie thinking it would get better at some point.

The next time Travolta suggests a movie like this. I can only hope that someone comes to their senses.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Oh, the humanity
Review: I agree with the review that states that this was the best comedy of the year. If it was meant to be funny, I would give it five stars. Unfortunately, it wasn't, and between laughs at its total and complete stupidity, there's a pang of horrible, wrenching dismay that human art has sunk so low as the produce this stinking, rotting pile of horsedung.

My brain throbs just recalling this movie. Somewhere between cavemen piloting 1000 year old Harriers, livestock being blown up with exploding neck braces, and crosscutting to a guy wandering around with a nuclear missile in his hands as if it were a chair he was moving, I decided that this movie had earned the title of "travesty". I'm pretty sure our nuclear capabilities weigh a bit more than twenty pounds, more accurately I'm pretty sure they weigh enough to crush Mr. Neanderthal's spine in a matter of milliseconds. And that's just one of the huge, gaping flaws in this movie.

It may be extremely laughable, but don't give the monkeys on typewriters who created it any more money by buying this DVD. Wait for it to start looping on cable. A few less dirty words won't cheapen this stupid, stupid flick: I'm not sure anything could.

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: It's not the worst movie ever made
Review: This movie gets a well-deserved bad rap. It's not the worst movie ever made though, firstly, people with dreadlocks are made to look [bad], an idea I'm not all that opposed to. In fact, there are several movies worse than Battlefield Earth, one I recall is "Divorce: The Musical" but I digress. Though some of us may have difficulties with the idea of 1000 year old fighter planes that run without fuel or huge veins of gold that are just on the surface of the planet that we missed for some reason to be reasons to not see the film, I say watch it once, just use someone else's money. But have your [throw-up] bag ready. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.


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