Rating: 
Summary: It's like I know these people...
Review: Brendan Halpin's memoir is exactly that - a memoir - that is, a narrative composed from personal experience. It is beautifully written in a free-form style which leaves you feeling like you're sitting in a pub with Brendan every night while he tells you his story. And like any good friend, you will laugh with him, cry with him, and be outraged along with him.I've been in healthcare for over thirty years, but as a patient, and this book resonated with both my husband and I. He, too, fears losing his best friend, like Brendan. For me, Brendan's voice is very much my husband's, and I will treasure certain lines from the book such as when Brendan has to stop and watch his wife and daughter come through the door, because his whole world just entered the room. But this book offers a glimpse into someone else's thoughts and experiences in a brutally honest and clear voice and for that reason, it should not be missed. It does not offer a resolution or answers to the big questions, but then neither does real life. And Brendan, you, Kirsten, and Rowen are welcome on our back deck anytime. We'd love to hear more of the story...
Rating:
Summary: A Good Read
Review: Brendan Halpin's memoir is exactly that - a memoir - that is, a narrative composed from personal experience. It is beautifully written in a free-form style which leaves you feeling like you're sitting in a pub with Brendan every night while he tells you his story. And like any good friend, you will laugh with him, cry with him, and be outraged along with him. I've been in healthcare for over thirty years, but as a patient, and this book resonated with both my husband and I. He, too, fears losing his best friend, like Brendan. For me, Brendan's voice is very much my husband's, and I will treasure certain lines from the book such as when Brendan has to stop and watch his wife and daughter come through the door, because his whole world just entered the room. But this book offers a glimpse into someone else's thoughts and experiences in a brutally honest and clear voice and for that reason, it should not be missed. It does not offer a resolution or answers to the big questions, but then neither does real life. And Brendan, you, Kirsten, and Rowen are welcome on our back deck anytime. We'd love to hear more of the story...
Rating:
Summary: love the honesty
Review: Congrats to Brendan Halpin on his searingly honest memoir. It's so refreshing when writers address this topic with honesty and humor rather than maudlin sentimentality. I couldn't disagree more with the reviews here who criticize him for this honesty. People would prefer he candy-coat it, I guess. It's funny--I read a similar book in my book group that I loved just as much, except it was fiction, called AFTER LUCY by Daniel Jones. It, too, is about this dilemma, told honestly and humorously from the husband's point of view. I'd recommend both of these books to anyone who's been through this situation, as I have. I don't know about you, but I find more comfort in reading about real emotions than Hollywood ones.
Rating:
Summary: The Title Says It All...
Review: I devoured this book! The title made me pull this book off the library shelf and check it out. I wanted to read it because of what my brother-in-law went thru when his wife -- my little sister -- died in 1996 from NonHodgkins Lymphoma. All the books out there are from the patient's perspective -- this was so refreshing because it was not. I plan to give this book to my brother-in-law, as well as my parents and other siblings. I know that we have all 'been there' like Halpin has...If you think Halpin misses the mark because he swears in his book or because he doesn't give us excruciating details about his wife's cancer...just remember what the book's title is -- this book is about the worried man...not the patient! Yes, Halpin's language is a bit rough, gritty, coarse, whatever -- so what? And yes, Halpin's thoughts are at times rambling and at times brutally frank, but that is the point...who has pure language and pure thoughts when a loved one is going thru cancer treatments and the outcome is unknown? Halpin has written a great book because he lets us experience his experiences up close and personal. He lets us know it is okay to feel things that may be at odds with what society says one must feel when a spouse or loved one has cancer...Halpin made me feel what he felt, he made me laugh, he made me cry -- he made me feel a lot less guilty for how [angry] I have been about my sister's illness, treatments, and ultimate death. Halpin's book was truly amazing! It's fantastic to realize this is his first book. I hope he writes more...I eagerly await his 2nd and 3rd and 4th....
Rating: 
Summary: Another Mass Local gets it...
Review: I got it all right. It needed an ending. After my sister died of cancer, the last thing i wanted to know was that her self-absorbed husband was more concerned about what to put in his diary than her health. Much less what kind of music he listen to as she died slowly. Mr. Halpin's experience is not unique, but his actions were. The book needed less about him and more about his relationship with his wife and family. In the end, the book would have been better off to offer some form of (spiritual?) reason as to why she had cancer and why she lived. Instead, Mr. Halpin just wrapped it up with a handful of possible yet implausible options. He should have thought first THEN written the book. My prayers go out to the family.
Rating:
Summary: I laughed, I cried, and you will too...
Review: I read this book, and to be perfectly honest, I'm not sure what the purpose or point of the book is. I guess I didn't expect the book to make some grand point. What's the point of cancer? What's the point of love? What's the point of pain? Is it reasonable to expect Halpin to answer such questions? I don't think so. It Takes A Worried Man is diary of sorts, but don't let that scare you away. Halpin's day-to-day experiences as his wife discovers she has stage four breast cancer and the ensuing treatment she undergoes are simply an enthralling read. You'll laugh, you'll cry -- if you're like me, you'll be damn glad your wife doesn't have breast cancer. Maybe that's the purpose.
Rating:
Summary: Fantastic book
Review: I was hesitant to read this book because I wasn't in the mood for anything depressing, but I'm so glad I did. It's told in such a humorous and real manner that it makes you feel like you're listening to an old friend. Although the subject matter is intense, it's not maudlin, and leaves you with the thought to really try and put things in perspective in your own life. I highly recommend this book and I hope that Mr. Halpin will have additional books in the future. I will continue to keep Kristen and the Halpin family in my prayers and wish for a full recovery.
Rating: 
Summary: An entertaining point of view from the MAN!!
Review: I'd actually give this 3 1/2 stars. This is a pretty quick and entertaining read. As the author states in the first paragraph, there isn't very much out there directed at the spouse of a breast cancer patient, so he decided to solve that problem. The author is able to relate his story of his wife's battle with breast cancer with a little bit of sentiment and a lot of humor. Some of the author's topics were a little over the top (several references to 70 & 80 rock bands, the author's school days, etc).... But I applaud his honesty and bravery. Of course, the book only covers about 6-9 months of his wife's battle. He even admits that if you're looking for finality - an ending - don't look for it here. For this reason, I think he should have perhaps waited a little longer before writing this book. It almost feels like this book was rushed into publication. As a woman who does not have breast cancer, it left me with several questions. I'm sure the spouses of breast cancer patients would have like a few more words of encouragement and a lot more info about what happens next but I'm sure they will be able to take comfort from most of what the author writes about learning that they are not alone. I understand that he felt he was putting something out there that was missing, but I couldn't help feeling that what is written in this book is somewhat incomplete. Still, I enjoyed the read and learned some new things I didn't kow about cancer. Maybe it is the author's intent to write a sequel down the road - just to keep us up to date and let know how it all turned out. If that's true, I'll proabably read that one too, just to see how it worked out.
Rating:
Summary: Wonderful book with a different--and important--perspective
Review: It Takes A Worried Man is a compelling and fluidly written memoir that uses both humor and hard-edged reality to outstanding effect. I highly recommend it, and not just for those who lives have been directly touched by cancer. I found it to be one of the most arresting books of its kind that I've encountered, precisely because the tone and perspective were so very distinct. I have to take issue with the review posted by the gentleman who feels his "30 years" in the health profession gives him the right to dismiss Halpin's honesty and humor as inappropriately glib and/or somehow sexist. Allow me then to draw on my many years of experience as a woman--one who has watched a good friend battle breast cancer and win as concrete a victory as is possible with this disease. There is nothing "off" about Halpin's tone, or his use of irony to articulate the profound absurdity--and pain--of what life sometimes throws our way. And there is no mistaking who is the real hero in this story--his wife Kristin. Halpin's love and powerful respect for his wife is palpable and tremendously moving. But equally moving is the real and extremely human reaction he has to the overwhelming fear and frustration that confronts both he and his wife on a daily basis. His fear and frustration is not analogous to hers--and how could it be? The author acknowledges his own constant underlying awareness that Kristin is the one who is sick, not him. He cannot shield her from this, and cannot truly ever know what it is she experiences. And this is not always an easy thing to for him to cope with. Sometimes in his struggle to be--simultaneously--a strong husband, a responsible father, an exemplary teacher and a good person, he finds himself faltering. Don't we all. His moments of joy, of anger, of despair, of goofiness or of self-deprecation build on the foundation of his love for his wife--and this is all the stuff of real life. Ultimately, this is not simply a work about a loving, imperfect spouse trying desperately to be a good man in a difficult situation. In a larger sense, this memoir is about the profound demands--and the profound joys--of human companionship. This is really an amazing portrait of what "marriage" means. And in that, it is far more than any simple-minded criticism can dismiss.
Rating: 
Summary: too damn much crying
Review: My mother's oncologist once told her that there are 2 kinds of men when it comes to wives' illnesses: those who care too much and those that care too little. It is admirable that Halpin is clearly one who cares too much and I found the initial stages of his account an honest, moving, and surprising amusing one. My father is also a man who cares too much and I had hoped to understand him better through Mr. Halpin's experience. I ultimately stopped reading simply because Halpin sobs in nearly every vignette. The sobbing became repetitive. Moreover I am completely unable to relate to a man who is so willing to openly sob to every person he meets, which strikes me as pathetically self-indulgent and weak. Sorry everyone - I suppose I realize it's important for men to be able to cry but it just reeks of insincerity and weakness when a man's response to every degree of sadness (OR happiness) is tears. While Halpin made much of his need to be strong for his wife, I could not help but think that his efforts lacked consequence and I eventually got tired of reading about them.
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