Honor Lost: Love and Death in Modern-Day Jordan

Rating:
Summary: a person who knows..
Review: When a friend told me about a book she was reading that had to do with a woman from Jordan, who wrote about her friend being killed because she fell in love with a Christian man, I became very interested. To my surpise this book was completely and utterly false and misinterprets Jordanian society. Being born an American, both my parents were born in Jordan. Yes, my mother was very conservative, but my father on the other had was open-minded considering he left Jordan at age 5, so it's hard being 16 with a strict mother.
Every summer, we go to visit family in Jordan. And I must say I cry everytime because I don't want to leave Jordan; I love it so much. The author discusses about how most men in Jordan beat their wives, and women don't have freedom, which is incorrect, because my aunt is the the head of [a branch] one of the best known banks in Jordan. Now your telling me that women are treated poorly? Of course not. I spoke to my mother about this author and how they think she fabricated the whole story, and she explained to me that she was probably talking about the little villages 50 miles away from Amman, which are mostly refugees.
Yes, there are consvervative families that actually do kill their daughters, wives, or sisters because they "dishonored" the family name, by having sex before marriage, or having some sort of "forbidden relationship" but that doesn't necessarily stereotype all Jordanians. If only the rest of the world can understand that Jordan is misrepresented by one of their own. Even though I am not Muslim, and that Honor Killings are not part of their religion, some people still do it. And the author exaggerates when a women speaks to a man, that she is to be punished. I find this to be ridiculous, and "honor killings" do happen in Jordan, but the reason I am writing this review is because the author depicts that all Jordanians act in such horrific manners.

Rating:
Summary: maybe fake, but message is clear
Review: While it is true that the author fabricated a lot of the things in the book, I know the practice of honor killings is real, and that women are treated really badly in the arab culture. From my own experience working with arabs and learning about their culture and religion, I can assure you incidents klike this do happen, and it's absolutely disgusting that Jordan has laws that allow such brutality against women. while women are more free in jordan than in other arab nations, they still face enormous constraints, and have a long way to go. I just wish Ms. khouri could've been more factual with this book. However, I do know that we have to call for an end to this oppression of women, and that we've gotta do it aggressively, for the Jordanian governement has certainly given this only superficial attention. Many Jordanainas and arabs say that they've a peaceful culture, and that women are equal to men in their life. IF so, then why are so many women killed for suspicion of having sex, while men can fool around a lot, but still get away with it? why is it that a man can easliy divorce a woman, but she can't, and that her testimony is half that of the man? Why does Jordan and other Muslim countries have laws that allow the brutality of women to go on? Many women in the Muslim/Arab culture say they have equal rights when they are treated as slaves by their men. Believe me, from traveling to these countries, I can assure you that many, many Jordanaina and other Arab/Muslim men don't want wives, they want slaves. I may sound biased, and I do know violence against women occurs in all countries, but the fact of the matter is that there's a strong disproportion in the number and viability of laws that treat women this way in Western societies and in MUslim/Arab societies. I'm not trying to attack a group of people, but we must be realistic and face the issues as they are, or they'll never be resolved. Queen Rania of Jordan herself has said that women are equal to men in her country, but that's an absurd lie. Then again, she's a politician, who must say this, to make the world have a better opinion of her culture. We see the glamour of a Muslim quuen like rania, but most women in her country are severly discriminated against, and though she may not have been sexually castrated, many of her fellow Jordanain sisters are, for so-called rumors of dishonor. In fact, the real relationship between husband and wife in the Arab culture really is that where a woman has the status between wife and a slave, where a man must treat her well, but if she disobeys him in any way, he certainly can resort to beating her. Many Muslim women say they're equal to men this just to get themselves through the day, or just to make their culture look nice. Obviously, they're not doing a good job of convincing the world of the equality given to them via the numerous beatings, murders, and torture they're enduring. While this nook is certainly not the best in the world, at least it did bring open the issue of honor killing, and we must do what we can to stop it. Moreover, the Jordanains and other Middle Easterners must also stop this madness, and to do that, they first must change their culture, change their beliefs system, change their view of women's roles and give them the absolute legal rights they deserve, and they must educate themselves that there's a fine line to be drawn between culture and being civilized. Honestly, what kind of a psycho kills his own flesh and blood just becasue she fell in love with a man of another culture/religion, refused an arranged marriage, or had pre-marital sex? Please, don't use culture as an excuse for this behavior, at least not in the modern world of the 21st century.
What the Jordanain/Arab world calls honor is a real disgrace to humanity to women worldwide, and they must reform themselves, drag dispose of their barbaric thinking on the position of women, and change their way of life. NO civilization can survive if light doesn't fall on its females. God bless and good luck to Jordanian/Arab women. Norma Khouri, while your book may not have been true, at least thank you for bringing this issue into the spotlight.

Rating:
Summary: Norma WHO???
Review: Arab America, let it be known to you all that this book is fiction, and Norma Khouri, the author, is using a cute made up last name. She is a Catholic South Side Chicago native who went to a Catholic High School in Chicago with me.

Love,

Mr. Gregory

Rating:
Summary: Package of lies from a con artist
Review: Buyers beware! - this book is a hoax!

From The Age newspaper, Melbourne Australia, August 21 2004:

Hoax author Norma Khouri has been on the run from the Chicago police and the FBI for more than five years. Now, they are about to catch up with her.

A source within the Chicago police department told The Age yesterday that they had reopened a metre-thick file on Khouri - whose real name is Norma Toliopoulos - with the aim of charging her. "We believe she is a con woman," the source said. "One of the best we've ever seen."

After a month-long investigation, The Age can today reveal that Khouri, 34, is alleged to have spent the best part of 10 years stealing from friends, lovers, family, and the sick and demented. She has netted at least $1 million from her crimes, perhaps more.

Chicago police were on the verge of issuing a warrant for her arrest in 1999 but she took flight, eventually resurfacing in Australia, where she wrote the best-seller Forbidden Love. The Sydney Morning Herald's literary editor, Malcolm Knox, last month revealed the book as a hoax. Documents since obtained by The Age show that, in 1996, Khouri took 97 US government bonds worth $US408,000 ($A563,000) from a safety deposit box owned by her elderly, demented neighbour, Mary Baravikas. Police believe Khouri also stole the old woman's house and $US33,000 in cash that was also in the deposit box. ...

Rating:
Summary: honestly, what would a man know?
Review: For a man to rant on and on about how wrong Norma Khouri is, how racist she is, and how she knows nothing of the topic of her life, is obnoxious and disgusting. I suppose as a western man VISITING an Arab family, they told you all about the deep religious and traditional values they hold over women. As a western man, I suppose you had to walk around shaperoned under pounds of heavy black material so that people could ignore your existance. Frankly, I am suprised that such an obvious redneck managed to finish the book and write a review about it. Your comments enforce the message that Norma is trying desperately to spread: the world needs to open their eyes and understand that this it is not right to treat women this way. Congradulations Norma on a heart-wrenching job well done!

Rating:
Summary: fraudulent
Review: for all those who claim to be reading this book for a research project, please put it down. those who have done real work on this, like rana husseini, have been at the forefront of those decrying this fraudulent book. if you honestly care about the victims of so-called honor killings then at least do them the justice of searching for the truth. something that cannot be found here.

Rating:
Summary: I Believe It
Review: I am a Western woman who has worked in Amman, and I believe that Norma's story, even if some of the facts have been altered or distorted to protect people, is essentially true. In addition, I am suspect of the person(s) who has so heavily criticized this book with his/her lengthy, capitalized rants. I believe it to be the writing of one person who has some sort of bone to pick with Norma or with anyone who would go on the record to report these crimes to a wide audience. Shame on him/her.

Rating:
Summary: Why does the distinction between fiction/nonfiction matter?
Review: If you like this book, you should do so regardless of whether it is really fiction or nonfiction. (Is there really much of a difference between the two?) If a book doesn't hold up when you pretend it's fiction, why bother reading it? I mean, what matters here is that to read a book is to experience the author's words. The question that people need to be asking is not whether there is some factual evidence behind them, but whether they move you from one to the next. Does she write good sentences? Good paragraphs? Is there beauty in them? Is there tragedy in them?

Rating:
Summary: So after all, this book is a work of fiction!
Review: Indeed! There was no need for us in Jordan to wait for an Australian reporter to reach this conclusion. We knew it all along!

I am a Western reviewer from Amman, a far more pleasant place than the author was willing to admit in her book! The author described Jordanian women as if they have only two choices: Stay in Jordan and be enslaved or move to the West and be free.

Now we know how false is this description and how fake is the author herself!

In 1977, the American author Alex Haley devised the term `faction' -to define a writing that is part fact and part fiction- when he was asked to describe the nature of his book `Roots' because it did not hold under historical scrutiny.

The ensuing question was then: Is this book, with its content and characters, a work of faction or (worse) of fiction?

The recent revelations about this book have answered this question: This book is so full of contradictions -within itself- and so full of lies and fabrications -about its Jordanian settings and people- that it could not stand the meticulous scrutiny of an enterprising and dedicated Australian journalist willing to check, independently and objectively, all the facts surrounding this `forbidden love' story that never happened!

To your readers, may I suggest two alternative books to this fake book, for a serious, informative and definitely non-fictional study about women in Jordan? They are both written by women and are both available in Amazon:

* `The Veil and the Male Elite' by Fatima Mernissi.

* `Women and Gender in Islam' by Leila Ahmed.

Regards.

Rating:
Summary: It's a lie
Review: Norma Khouri's book 'Honor Lost', sold under the title 'Forbidden Love' in the United Kingdom, has now been exposed as a fake. A journalist for the Australian newspaper 'The Syndey Herald', Malcolm Knox, has branded it as one of the most elaborate literary hoaxes of all time. Several bookshops have withdrawn it from the shelves at the request of the publisher.

The book is an allegedly factual account of the brutal murder of a young Muslim girl, carried out by her own father because of her involvement with a Christian man. But the tragic 'Dahlia', supposedly Norma Khouri's best friend, does not even exist. Khouri left Jordan at the age of three to live in the United States - she didn't grow up in Amman as she claimed. The hair dressing salon where she claimed to work never existed. And Dahlia is made up, too. Close American friends have spoken up against the book, saying that it cannot possibly be true because during the 1990's Khouri was in fact resident in America. According to the book, she was in Jordan at this time, watching her best friend run headlong towards death. Khouri's true story can be found on the eighth and tenth floors of the Cook County Circuit Court building, at the corner of Randolph and Clark streets in Chicago. Type her names into the database there and a lurid criminal record comes to light.

Random House, Khouri's publisher, subsequently demanded proof that she had lived in Jordan for all those years. Khouri couldn't provide it. She is now living as a virtual recluse, refusing to talk to journalists or her angry readers. A quick Internet search will reveal newspaper articles from all over the world, which document the international outcry that met the exposure. Leema Nabil, a Jordanian official who runs an association designed to protect women from so-called 'honor crimes', states that Khouri's hoax has set her movement back for decades, as people will now start doubting genuine claims made by women who really are in danger. Khouri promised to donate a portion of the book's proceeds to this worthy organization. According to Nabeel, the association received very little - just under one hundred dollars.

This book is nothing more than an opportunistic, money-grasping attempt to profit at the expense of thousands of women who lost their lives to honor killings. And when you strip it of its element of truth, you begin to see all the glaring literary faults that pockmark it - like poor dialogue, clumsy paragraphing, and a complete disregard for key literary devices like the build-up of tension. It doesn't even cut it as a novel.