How to Mend a Broken Heart : Letting Go and Moving On

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Summary: I will survive!
Review: After my breakup, I read this book and found the source of why I was attracted to someone who made me so unhappy. Apparantly, our negative childhood patterns can sometimes haunt us and lure us into unhealthy and unhappy relationships. The author gives many case studies, and examples from many different types of situations, which was helpful to read. She is a bit cold and impersonal at times in her writing. Yet, she makes up for those shortcomings with the depth of her understanding of the nature of failed relationships. This part was the best piece of advice: She writes "Cultivate detachment. Separate your needs from your wants. Wanting and needing are two different things. The intensity of your wants may, in fact, thwart your efforts to attain what you desire. Everything is a process. Remind yourself that whatever happens, you'll survive-you're strong and you stand on your own two feet. If the relationship or job you want doesn't work out, you'll still survive. You're an independant person. You aren't at the mercy of other people's whims. You're comptetent and resourceful within yourself, so you'll survive no matter what." Being so terribly sad, these words were priceless. Read this book. It could be the one that helps you turn the corner and move on.

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Summary: Good advice that can be too harsh at times.
Review: I enjoyed this book, but I am writing this review to warn some of you that this probably shouldn't be the first book you read after a tough break-up or divorce. The first section of the book is sometimes harsh and negitive about the value of love and it's importance in your life. Most things said are very true, but it sometimes comes across blunt and a hard manner to absorb if you are still very emotionally tender, or rather depressed. I would recommend a more light/positive book first, such as "Mars And Venus: Starting Over." Again, it's a good book, the case studies are very helpful but it may be a little hard for some of us who have seen our significant other just walk out the door. Hope this helps, but then again it's just my two cents!

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Summary: Close to Receiving Actual Therapy after the Broken Heart
Review: Well, first, I think everyone of us needs to acknowledge the heart is broken before reading anything or seeking any help. I read through this book and the points the author made are remarkable. People always say, "You get hurt. What things are you doing to make you feel better?" Well, seriously follow the guide the author tells you. I went through a painful breakup and was under the partial program. The path this book suggested is very similar to what I was told in the partial program. I did what the partial program people told me and it worked. After the broken heart, the first thing is really giving the attention and the care. Focus on yourself. This book has good tips about how to do so. Put your broken heart into what she says and try to understand. Feel it as the pain and anger comes. It is ok. Practice what she says. It is ok to take good care of yourself.

Again, one book is not going to fix it all. There are so many layers you need to explore and acknowledge. There are so much garbage you have inherited from the past, especially your early childhood experience. You cannot just expect you will feel completely good after one reading. However, try to explore what the author says. If you are searching for "do things to feel better", read this book and do what the author suggests. Identify what the author says and do what the author told you. Remind yourself you might have the tendency to withdraw or try self-medicating yourself. You will have that tendency because you are human. Stay in presence.

This book also offers you as an extra support for you to understand many of us go through heartbreaks. We just all do. The heart will hurt and it will seem like it is forever. But until we can truly honor the pain can we truly heal. It is about healing and not running away from it. The book offers the help and telling you that you are not crazy. Your experience was just not widely spread in the public media but it happens in our society. Please take really good care of yourself. You will heal when you walk out from this experience and find out who you are meant to be.


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Summary: The most helpful ....
Review: When I recently went through a very painful break-up, I ended up purchasing approximately 10 books to read to help me through it. THIS was the one that helped me the most. It is a compassionate, realistic look at how you're feeling, what you're going through and how you may avoid repeating these mistakes again, again and again all of them. The author reminded me throughout of my own self-worth and helped me to come to an understanding of who I am and why I chose this relationship to begin with - and what I could gain by letting it go, yeah!! living through the pain, and seeing a new life on the other side. I hope I NEVER experience this kind of pain again. With the valuable words of Ms. Koman's I could see a light at the end of the tunnel and a greater understanding of who I am and what kind of life I could provide for myself in the future.