Rating: 
Summary: Too many vegetables, not enough meat and potatoes
Review: I decided to title this review with a "Phil-ism" because this is the first thing you have to get used to if you read or listen to anything Dr. Phil says. I bought this book when it first came out in 2001 because I was struck by his no-nonsense, sensible approach to issues when I first saw him on the Oprah Winfrey show which was a refreshing change from the 'girly men'-type self-helpers either promulgating a 'victimization mentality' or hocking some sort of pseudo-New Age type techniques to solve all of your ills. Didn't read it until now and although my thoughts about Dr. Phil have changed since I first bought it, I will attempt to give an unbiased review from memory.
Basically as others have stated, this book attempts to show that most people's entire self concept is influenced by external things that have happened in their lives and much more importantly, by how these external factors (10 defining moments, 7 critical choices, 5 pivotal people) are internalized in your psyche. These negative internal feelings that you harbor in various ways then prevent you from living a fulfilling, happy life - not living within your 'authentic self' Dr. McGraw attempts to guide you through the mechanisms of how these thoughts materialize in your 'fictional self' and how you can change them as to take advantage of all of the abilities, needs, and desires that you were born with.
I read through the entire book, but I felt it to be a bit tedious. He takes too much time explaining and defining conceps and reiterating the fact all to often that HE is going to show you how to improve your life, yet he makes you do all the work! True, to change any portion of your life YOU have to make sacrifices and exert some effort, but Dr. Phil doesn't really do much in the way of anything except just giving you a high school pep talk before you play the game. A book filled with more real-life examples of his patient's stories and how they got in touch with their authentic selves would have benefitted me much more than a cornucopia of psychological termas: AAAs, MERs, etc. I always hear Dr. Phil say to "Get Real" so isn't the best way to do that is to hear 'real' stories by 'real people'? He spends 3/4 of the book explaining terms and concepts and only the last chapter telling you how to implement them. To me, implementation is the most difficult and important thing you have to do if you want to change your life and THAT should have been a bulk of the book. All in all, it was too long-winded.
In my hardback edition, there was definitely a problem in the math dept. In the first section where you have to divide 2 numbers to get a guage on to what degree you are living in your fictional self, the editor put in a square root symbol and relating to the exercises in Appendices A and B, the charts given to determine your degree of locus of control are NOT explained as well as wrong (should be from 5 to 20 NOT 5-40 from what I could see) Another thing that irked my was some of Dr. Phil's plain Texas talk. To me, he loses some credibility. If you want me to be the best person I can be, to show me that I'm special with unique abilites, don't talk to me like a commoner! I don't want psychobabble either, but I would take what he says more seriously if he talked to me as a professional.
There is some value in every book and I did find some things in here, such at the hierarchy of how you base your critical choices, some good quotations, and it did help me understand why some people in my life are they way are. On a whole though, it didn't really help me that much and wasn't worth the time spent.
Rating: 
Summary: IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE
Review: "I believe that people CAN change for the best, literally in the blink of an eye--IF what they're hearing or reading truly resonates with their innermost authentic selves, with who they really are at the core, before the world took them away. This is the essential self that can truthfully answer 'Yes' to the following two questions, 'Is my life good and getting better because of what I believe?' and, 'Are the lives of the people with whom I interact enhanced for knowing me?'"Any vague feelings of dissatisfaction that you might be feeling with your life, any growing uneasiness, could be your authentic self whispering to you, 'Come back.' And you might realize--after reading Dr. Phil's profoundly wise and easily accesible book--that the longest journey you've ever taken was the one away from yourself, and that ultimately, you never left. It's as easy as you make it. "We're all impostors in our lives until we remember how to 'live from the inside out,' and act on what we know. Dr. Phil shares valuable, step-by-step guidelines and suggests that we remember 10 defining moments in our lives, seven critical choices that we've made, and five pivotal people. I invite you to make one of your critical choices reading this book, one of your defining moments following the exercises, and one of your pivotal people Dr. Phil." Kathleen Hawkins, Spiritual Strategist(TM) and author of Spirit Incorporated: How to Follow Your Spiritual Path from 9 to 5.
Rating: 
Summary: An Insightful Read
Review: "Self Matters" by Dr. Phil is a very energetic, clear, insightful read. I felt like a student being lectured to by an awesome Professor. I had to take breaks at times (lots of info). He provides various projects and questionnaires which serves to assess the state of our individual being. Through his analysis, he clearly points out we are all a result of life's
conditioning. He coaches us into discovering our 'core', center, authentic self, from which to live, an alternative to the old, unexamined, mechanical, stimulus response behavior we've learned (from other people & past experiences) for survival. He insists with his urgent, in-your-face style that living from your 'core' yields authentic joy, freedom, clarity,
and true self-expression. The book is semi-psychoanalytical in feeling, in a fun and sometimes humorous way. According to this book there is work to be done, but hey, it's worth meeting your true self and living a full and satisfying life!
If you like this book, you may want to try the collaborative work of Ariel and Shya Kane's "Working On Yourself Doesn't Work." It's a great follow-up book to "Self Matters." I found it a refreshingly different path leading to a similar place. Their non-judgmental, being-in-the-moment philosophy and the 3 principles of transformation offer a more anthropological way of looking and discovering our true selves. It's a gentle, effortless read with many profound insights simply and directly stated. Love the illustrations provided and yes, I did most certainly meet myself on so many of the pages......Oh, and it's a great pocket pal to take on vacation or to keep in a backpack for an immediate uplift and to get back on track with your life.
Ellen in Connecticut
Rating:
Summary: FANTASTIC BOOK - NOT ENOUGH STARS FOR THIS ONE!
Review: As a counsellor and one who has studied behavioural psychology extensively, this will definitely be a book that will be highly recommended reading material. McGraw challenges the reader to take a look beyond one's mirror image and discover who the individual truly is inside. It is extremely thought provoking and readers will find themselves doing some deep soul searching to come up with honest answers. Sometimes finding one's true self is a painful experience, for many people are quite willing to identify their strengths but are less enthusiastic when it comes to identifying (and admitting) their weaknesses and imperfections. The people who come through our lives and leave their mark, the choices we make and the critical events that happen in our lives, all determine to a certain degree, who we are and what we will become. Genetics also plays a part as well as our early childhood experiences. However, this book is really a book in understanding one's inner self. Of course, our life is created from the inside out! Those who fail to see the value of the book, are missing out on in important lesson in life: the basic psychology of "what makes us tick." McGraw has written a dramatically poignant, frank and intellectual book that enables the reader to "pull down the masks and walls," maximize their full potential, and live the life of the person they were intended to be. If one does not comprehend the purpose and significance of the book, they are sadly missing out on an insightful journey into self-discovery. "Self Matters" is a fantastic book; there are not enough stars for this one!
Rating:
Summary: Disapointed for the First Time by Dr Phil, sad
Review: As a longtime Dr. Phil and Operah fan, I got this book with the highest of expectancy. How ever, I find it to be full of advise which if followed, would not be as affected as his previous tomes. Obviously we create our lifes from the inside out. How else would this happen? Outside-in is just backwards and leaves a hollow person. This is the type of obvious logic which runs rampart in this book of Dr. Phil. The lack of input of Mrs. Orpha Winfrey is also sorely lacking, and may be the reason for my disappointed. His tone also is more harsh than normal. Normal I find his "get real" Phil-osophy (get it?) to be a breath of fresh air, but here it is "over the edge" - when he sites an example of a men being unsure of how to paint his car and despondent over his losing of a job and his girlfriend turning out to be underage, Dr. Phil is uncharactericly harsh, and his advise consists of "get over it". Get over it? Dr. Phil, I may be "over you", which maeks me sad because some of the best times of my live has been reading yoru advise, watching your shows, watching you on Operah and the fireworks between you that are close to heaven's ardor, reading your cookbooks, eating your snack bars, and watching you on other talk shows and how you look like Jeffroy Tambor and your good humors about that embarassment. I hope in the future you stick to waht you know best, good "get real" advise, and stay away from life-creating, that is God's work, I hope you know.
Rating:
Summary: raises self-awareness - and misses the real challenge
Review: As a person and professional psychotherapist, I have studied human motivation, behavior, and relationships professionally for over 40 years. My conclusion about "creating your life from the inside out" is very different from McGraw's. He makes no mention of the observable reality that the lives of average people from troubled childhoods (i.e. most of us) are governed by a group of personality "subselves" who often are disorganized and conflicted.
This can change, if people become interested in freeing their resident true Self (capital "S") to harmonize their other subselves. Hundreds of practicing clinicians around the country help people do this via "Internal Family Systems" therapy.
McGraw's ideas sound practical and useful, build hope, and DO promote healthy self-awareness. However, I suspect that most people will be unable to benefit significantly from his suggestions because they're unaware that their lives are often ruled by false selves. This is one explanation for vexing compulsions, why most diets don't work, widespread trouble keeping New Year's resolutions, and often doing self-harmful things "anyway." ...
For more perspective, see this:
http://sfhelp.org/01/innerfam1.htm
Rating:
Summary: Self Matters: A Professional Psychologist' perspective
Review: As a professional therapist I must say that Dr. Phil McGraw's Self Matters is a powerful and life changing book that has answered a number of questions that have plagued me, and I'll bet millions of others. Dr. McGraw's handling of a complex subject is eloquently brilliant! So many others TRY to make the concept of "self" understandable but fall short, however well intended. Choosing to avoid all of the New Age, "inner-self" type rhetoric Dr. McGraw treats the subject of who you have become and importantly how with a directness that is his trade mark. Leading you through the history of your life with a focus and a purpose he gives you the tools and focus to take even the most difficult past and turn it into personal power. Dr. McGraw chooses stories from his own life that are decidedly relateaable. Rather than using dramatic, headline news type sensationalism he shows us how each of us have events that are important to each of us, even if not to everyone else. By leading us to examine both external and internal factors about ourselves, he leads us to deal with reality of life yet claim the power of self definition. Concepts such as PERSONAL TRUTH, AUTHENTIC SELF, DEFINING MOMENTS, CRITICAL CHOICES, PIVOTAL PEOPLE AND INTERNAL DIALOGUE were life altering for me and will become part of therapuetic regimine as I treat my patient population. I did not think it was possible but SELF MATTERS is even better than LIFE STRATEGIES AND RELATIONSHIP RESCUE. Well done and thank you.
Rating:
Summary: must read if you want to be authentic
Review: I first read this book a year ago and then put it aside and let it collect dust. I recently had a bad semester at school and deceided to give Dr. Phil another try. I realized that I had been living up to the expectations of others and doing things for others and forgeting about me. His section on "Labels" really hit me. I guess when you get assigned a label, you live only according to that label and basically live in a box. But you're much more than just a label! Now, I'm alot happier and I don't worry so much about what other people think of me and living in my box. If you're down in the pits, give this book a try. You may hate it at first, but it's sort of like medicine.
Rating:
Summary: SELF MATTERS-DR. PHIL
Review: I LOVED THIS BOOK!
DR. PHIL PROVIDES SOUND REASONING AND EXCELLENT TOOLS WE CAN USE TO CHANGE OUR LIVES.
I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS BOOK, 'SELF MATTERS'... TO ANYONE WHO 'THINKS' THEY ARE POWERLESS TO GET ON WITH LIFE.
Rating: 
Summary: "Self Matters"? More like, "SELF LOATHING"!
Review: I picked up this book one night at a local super store. I cracked it open and began to read. It appeared to offer something... then I started reading it at home.
I may have been in a vulnerable state and just wanted someone to tell me how to fix things and make me a better man. I'd heard Dr. Phil was just that type of person so, why not?
This all happened last year. I started reading it and felt like I was just spinning my tires. He spun some good stories in there, but just when I thought the Dr. would deliver something I could sink my teeth into, he would go on AGAIN about the "actualized self" or some other buzz word. I quite reading it after 2 chapters.
A few weeks ago I had a long trip and picked up the book on tape at the library [*a good option before you buy it!]. I figured that maybe I didn't give it a chance. Again and again I heard how "I wasn't this" or "I wasn't that" and "I'll never be this until I come face to face with my 'actualized self'." I fast forwarded the type and listened AGAIN AND AGAIN. Same thing.
If I had a nickel for every time I heard "actualized self" or whatever he referred to, I'd be self-made and rich like Dr. Phil.
BOTTOM LINE: I felt worse about myself because of this book. [*I admit I didn't read it all, but felt I'd end up a miserable self-loathing, "actualized self" by book's end!]
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