Rating: 
Summary: culture shock
Review: Going through the reader reviews, my concern for the misunderstanding between the West and Middle East is disturbingly reinforced, and I'm shocked that many Arab readers have this "she should have known" response and protest their culture is being insulted, one that murders thousands of their own and deny themselves truly loving relationships that can only exist with freedom. I'm also feeling a little less concerned with the "why they hate us" question. It seems a lot like wondering why a rascist would hate Martin Luther King.
Rating:
Summary: Jordanian males often treat their women abominably
Review: Norma Khouri informs us about the hostility toward women in the Arab Muslim world. She was born and raised in Jordan, a country where its rather benevolent and sophisticated leaders, Prince Abdullah and Princess Rania, do not dare to truly oppose the totalitarian Islamic mullahs. At best, the royal family limits its actions to saying a few words in protest. Women are treated worse than dirt. An overwhelming number of Jordanian men make the most outrageous American male chauvinist pig seem like a raving progressive feminist by comparison. These guys even feel a cultural obligation to hit their own mothers and sisters. The so-called offense may be as minor as the woman being a little late in preparing dinner. Norma is a Catholic, but the men in her family do not hesitate to abuse their women. The radical Muslim zeitgeist dominates the land---and even the police and court system refuse to protect the female citizens living under Jordan's perverse legal system. Dalia is Norma's best friend since childhood. She is a Muslim who wishes to become educated and live her own life. Michael is both a Catholic and a foreigner, and their love must be hidden from her family. Unfortunately, the father learns of the romance and orders Dalia's brother to murder her. He does so boldly knowing full well that the Muslim clerical judges will barely slap his wrist. An "honor killing" is classified as a mere misdemeanor. Is this all done behind closed doors? Shockingly, the Jordanian government even keeps meticulous records concerning this particular practice. The reader's blood pressure and rage will increase the further along they get into this book. You should soon realize that the social milieu of Jordan and the other Arab countries in this region must be destabilized. The status quo has to change if women are to ever to be justly treated. A cynic once remarked that the feminists of the Western World can either be avid feminists, or adherers to the tenets of political correctness---but they can't be both at the same time! They can no longer pretend to look the other way. The brutal fact is that some cultures are indeed better than others. Reactionary and despicable cultures deserve to be unhesitatingly condemned. The author has placed her own life in jeopardy by writing this hauntingly truthful book. We should not merely read Norma Khouri's "Honor Lost," but also advocate for the rapid elimination of the militant Islam. The more moderate Muslims must be encouraged to wrest control from these monsters. Is this really our problem? The answer is an unhesitating yes. The same people who slaughtered our racially and ethnically diverse citizens on 9/11 look kindly on the ancient practice of honor killing. Their ultimate goal is world domination. It is a mistake to believe that they desire to control only the regions of their indigenous homelands. The women of Western Civilization should beware. Dalia's murder is a warning to them. They could be next.
Rating:
Summary: The Painful Truth
Review: As a life-long student of world religions, I found this book to be outstanding and, unfortunately, painfully true. It is interesting to see what length some people in the world will go to defend barbarism and murder in the name of religion. ...
Rating:
Summary: Honor Lost--Love and Deat in Modern-Day Jordan
Review: This book has made me a different person in so many ways. After crying for a little while I managed to finish it. It has opened my eyes, as well as many others to relize what is going on in Jordan and that King Abdullah 2 is not a wonderful leader. This book is true and only one of the thousands of problems in Jordan that women must deal with After reading this book, I feel I have become a part of Norma's life and as well suffered Dalia's death.Even worse, I feel like I have started grieving the women, even the ones living happy lives, in Jordan. They are not free, they do not know what freedom is. This book has inspired me to stick up for what I believe in, and feel that I can make a difference. I am still young but hope one day I can be as strong a person as Norma. God bless Norma, and thank you so much for sharing your story. It will make a difference!
Rating: 
Summary: Inner Contradictions & Dalia¿s tragic mistake!
Review: As an Arab and a Muslim woman, I would like -with your kind permission- to contribute with my review. Like Dalia and the author, I was born in Amman, a city so unlike the one described in this book where daily life is depicted in apocalyptic terms chosen to shock the West into empathy with the author. Michael exempted, she has reduced the Jordanian men into caricatured monsters after the blood of their female relatives for any hint of 'dishonouring' the family. As for us women, we are no more than ewes awaiting slaughter, which is very demeaning to us, as her fellow 'sisters'!! This book is riddled with such hurtful inaccuracies. For clarity's sake, my review is four-fold: The study of the author's style, two MAJOR inner contradictions (where two CENTRAL claims will be disproved) and a typical dramatisation instance. */STYLE/* This book ISN'T a direct account of the events. Instead, the author decided to 're-formulate' the dialogue attributed to herself and all the participants in Dalia's tragedy, as if it was a film script about Dalia's life. A direct account, by definition, doesn't allow editing events-as the author becomes a mere mouthpiece relating the ACTUAL dialogues and actions. However, 're-scripting' allows the author to edit and interpret AT WILL the ORIGINAL dialogues/actions, according to his/her PERSONAL agenda and motives, before presenting them again as ACTUALITY. The author chose re-scripting to give herself COMPLETE EDITORIAL of the events during the last 14 fateful months of Dalia's life. It suggests the author isn't as comfortable as she seems with how the REAL events unfolded. */FIRST CONTRADICTION/* The author recounts with pride how she was PARTICIPATING in matching Dalia with Michael SECRETLY because she feared the risks if anyone concerned was caught. But, AS SOON AS Dalia was indeed caught, in an attempt to deflect any blame and criticism levelled at her, the author professed her shock and surprise at Dalia's death, as if she was JUST A BYSTANDER witnessing a horrific murder. For example, she claims that 'She (Dalia) knew her family better than anyone, after all'! Such a defence is hollow because their two families were INTIMATE FOR YEARS: Dalia's family was the author's and vice-versa. This is why they were allowed to work together!! THE AUTHOR CANNOT HAVE IT BOTH WAYS. */SECOND CONTRADICTION/* The two central claims of this book are: 'Michael and Dalia were IN LOVE' and 'Dalia's death was INEVITABLE'. Both are contradicted by the events that left me therefore in NO doubt that Dalia would be ALIVE today had she NOT made ONE tragic mistake which is the following. As the book relates about Michael, Dalia relied on ONE person ONLY: The author who SHARES Michael's Catholicism. Dalia DIDN'T confide in ANY of her Muslim friends or sympathetic relatives who'd have spoken on her behalf to her family, if necessary. This mistake left her ISOLATED from her MUSLIM community and therefore VULNERABLE to groundless suspicions from HER FAMILY, with fatal consequences, as we know. After knowing each other for FOURTEEN months DANGEROUSLY, neither Michael nor Dalia considered marriage SERIOUSLY. It has ONLY ONE meaning: THEY DIDN'T LOVE EACH OTHER; refuting thus the FIRST CENTRAL CLAIM. Because, IN THE MIDDLE EAST, REAL lovers, in THEIR PRECARIOUS PREDICAMENT, will NOT stall for FOURTEEN months over marriage. Every minute counts to them! I EXPERIENCED THAT PREDICAMENT MYSELF as my husband, like Michael, was originally Catholic. About the SECOND CENTRAL CLAIM, tragically, time finally caught up with Dalia: by catching her innocently and secretly mixing with the author AND a MALE stranger (EVEN if he were a Muslim, it wouldn't have made ANY difference), her family jumped to the WRONG conclusion. So, ultimately, NOT involving ANY Muslim confidants proved DALIA'S TRAGIC MISTAKE!! Had she done the opposite, she'd be ALIVE now. Conversely, Michael involved his OWN sister for self-protection. Then, why didn't he advise Dalia to do likewise, if he REALLY loved her? Had he done so, as said above, she'd be amongst us: The SECOND CENTRAL CLAIM is groundless too! Thus, the claims that Michael and her were passionately in love and that her death was inevitable are BOTH contradicted by the events of this book itself; which becomes therefore a good example of DICHOTOMY: This book marketing campaign tells us to draw a specific message from it (i.e Dalia died for 'loving Michael') whereas, once read as a JORDANIAN book, it yields the opposite. The question is: 'How do these inner contradictions exist side-by-side in the book without destroying it'? The answer is simple: It contains TWO SEPARATE SELF-CONTAINED books. The first book is written to attract the sympathy of the West whereas the second is to seek 'revenge' on Jordan and Islam. It is ONLY when the two books are CONNECTED in the mind of, say, a modern Middle Eastern reader that the book credibility collapses under the strain of its inner contradictions. */DRAMATISATION/* The facts about Dalia's life, her friendship with Michael, her family and her society have been so dramatised beyond Jordanian reality. For instance, the way Michael and Dalia 'fell in love' is so unconvincing: After cutting his hair THREE times ONLY in just TWO weeks! Were they using the elixir of love for shampoo? It is IMPOSSIBLE in any Arab Muslim/Christian country to bring down the GENDER wall (IN ADDITION to the RELIGIOUS one) between a CATHOLIC MAN and a MUSLIM WOMAN in just THREE HALF-HOUR meetings in TWO weeks. IT SIMPLY DEFIES BELIEF. In conclusion, this book is a forgettable non-event about a non-existent 'forbidden love'! Something is seriously amiss in this book, from the very start: the author's candour! Dalia's life deserves a far better memorial. God Bless her soul! Thank you for giving me this chance to review this book
Rating:
Summary: Truth for a Change
Review: It is interesting that the Islamic reviewers fully admit that daughters may be killed in Islamic societies if they disobey male family members, and that women have virtually no choice in their marriage partners, then, the same Islamic writers protest that the book holds Islamic society up to criticism. The Bukhari Hadith, considered an authoritative source of information about the teachings of Mohammed, clearly quotes Mohammed as stating the "women are deficient in religion and intellect."
Why don't the Islamic reviewers just admit the truth?To what are they objecting? Women are second class citizens in Islam. Even debating the debate is ridiculous in light of the facts.
Rating:
Summary: Bad Mix of Fiction
Review: The Author was able to mix fiction in a real setting to give the impression that her information was real and not a fragment of her imagination laced with a true urban Jordanian story that she either was a witness to or even worse have heard about.
This might be a great story to tell the immigration officer when trying to flee Jordan especialy when being denied visa and a ticket out. I too sometimes feel like leaving everything and going to a new place and i did hear many discuss fake stories like men claiming they are homosexuals in order to be able to get Visa's to the US and other western countries and many more about claims of abuse feeding on the western lack of concrete understanding of the middle east culture.
Rating:
Summary: Bad fiction for a good cause
Review: As an Arab, Jordanian, Muslim woman educated in the West and living in the heart of Amman, Jordan, for the past 20 years, I was astonished at Ms. Khouri's attempt at portraying Jordanian women as being subservient to the men in our families and society. Her sweeping statements about the status of women in this country, in addition to her similarly-sweeping statements about our culture, heritage and religion(s), are so extremely misleading -- and often outright false -- that one wonders about the author's real agenda. I am extremely disappointed that such an important issue as the murder of women and girls done in the name of honor has been degraded into such bad fiction. Honor crimes do exist in Jordan, as in other parts of the region. It is by no means excusable under any circumstances and any pretexts. And it is no secret these murders happen. Jordanian women activists have been at the forefront of fighting these crimes and continue to do so relentlessly. They continue to fight for women's civil rights, and achievements, as slow as they may be, are being made in that direction. So, NO, not all, not even most, women here are subservient or stay in the kitchen. Walk in the streets of Amman and go to its restaurants, cafes and clubs and you will see that half are women, some veiled, some not. Go to any government institution or private company, and you will see a substantial percentage of the work force are women. It is truly insulting that Ms. Khouri gives the impression, through her book, that we are slaves, mindless, helpless creatures, who have only two choices: Either live as slaves at home in Jordan, or escape to the West to be free. That is far from the truth. Ms. Khouri's book, which she claims to be a true story about her Muslim best friend's brutal murder by her father because she loved a young Christian man (which she often refers to as "Catholic," very unusual reference to Christians here), is so packed with false information, including important and unimportant details, that one wonders about the credibility of the whole story. Examples: -- The writer does not know the countries that border her own country? She included Lebanon and Kuwait as bordering Jordan. They don't. -- At one point, Ms. Khouri writes that her brother gave her a 50-dinar bill. There were no 50-dinar bills in 1996, and only came out after King Abdullah assumed the throne in 1999. -- She writes her father was shocked to see a man (taxi driver) at her front door waiting to be paid the fare, repeatedly complaining about how strict her and her best friend, Dalia's, fathers and brothers were, not allowing them out of the house without a chaperone, not allowed to speak to men, etc. But yet, these very same backward men allow them to open a unisex hair salon where men can come and go as they please and have their daughters cut men's hair? It just doesn't fit, and certainly not in the lower-middle class area of Jabal Hussein. If their fathers and brothers were so concerned about their "family name," they would NEVER have allowed them the luxury of opening a unisex salon. -- The Islamic Action Front did not have a majority in Parliament when the National Assembly rejected revoking the law that gave lenient punishment to the killers of women. In fact, the Islamic Action Front boycotted these parliamentary elections and not one single member was in the National Assembly at the time. Or was this piece of misinformation slipped in to blame the Islamic movement for parliament's unjust decision? The list is endless, and that's why I question the credibility of the whole story and on an issue that is so important to many of us. Ms. Khouri is clearly a fiction-writer, though not a very good one. And I urge NO ONE to read it, unless you want to waste your time, like I did.
Rating:
Summary: Brave truth
Review: The author uses all senses to transport you to her homeland, to see the beauty, taste the food and understand the nature and prison of being a woman. You are with her, at 15 trying to find a way to be independent and be with your best friend, at 25 finding your best friend attracted to a forbidden man. The dynamic relationships make you explode with emotion as you read on and on. I didn't put this book down once, but read all the way through. Don't let other reviewers fool you with "rational" arguments that make no sense. They are the secret keepers willing to kill to keep silence. This book deserves to be written on gold and is told by a woman who left everything to write it. I praise Norma Khouri, it was not your fault, thank you for your courage!
Rating: 
Summary: Tragic and Unforgetable
Review: "Honor Lost" is a about two women who risk all for love. Dalia, a Muslim, and Norma, a Christian, have been friends since birth and have idealistic dreams that go beyond what is expected of them as women growing up in the Middle East. Within the constraints of a Muslim society, Dalia and Norma must plot and manipulate to gain every morsel of freedom they desire from a culture that, for centuries, has rigidly designated their place as women. They begin by opening a beauty salon under the watchful eye of Dalia's brother, Mohammed, and slowly, through careful planning are able to acquire more and more freedoms--freedoms which eventually take them down a tragic path. Dahlia meets and falls in love with Michael, a Catholic young man who comes in for a haircut. Efforts to facilitate secret rendezvous between the two lovers end in tragedy as Dalia's family learns of her relationship with the young man, and they respond with the swiftest brutality imaginable. Norma is forced to flee Jordan in fear of her life and, in exile, writes this tragic account and leads us into a terrifying world of "honor" killings. Ms. Khouri clearly states that she and Dalia got too bold and blinded by their successes in deceiving their parents and does not "shift the blame" as other reviewers would have us believe. Yet she does hold the murderers of her friend completely responsible for their actions in response to that deceit, as well she should. She also does NOT blame Islam for these killings as she clearly states that these acts predate Islam, even though modern day Muslims will quote passages in the Qur'an to justify this form of brutality. Ms. Khouri's intention is to bring to light the great human rights violations that is being committed against Muslim women. This is not a case of twisting the story to make the West judge the East as many accuse her of, but of East crying out for justice, mercy and compassion for its women--something that seems missing in the modern day, male dominated Middle East and elsewhere. In this, Ms. Khouri delivers. That said, it is important to keep in mind that although this book review is subject to interpretation, it is made in good faith and free of prejudice.
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