Rating: 
Summary: Please help Jordanian women by just reading this book
Review: Jordanian women are 2nd class citizens in Jordan. Therefore, many human rights that American women enjoy in the USA are denied over there. For e.g., without a husband's permission, Jordanian women are NOT allowed to renew their passports. Plus committers of honor crimes do not face tough sentences in any court of law in Jordan. The government of Jordan is against honor crimes. But murderers are still set free. This is because it is a cultural thing that the government could not stop despite its efforts, which I respect very much. Many Arab men spend time with American women but when it comes to their female relatives having a regular friendship with an American male, they are instantly killed because they think women are family property and should only stay in the kitchen. So there is a double standard. I do not know the meaning of honor but I still think it is wrong for a human to kill another. This is the greatest book you will fine that accurately describe the culture in Jordan through a real story that is worth reading.
Rating: 
Summary: A real eye-opener.
Review: This book not only made me sympathize with the plight of women throughout the world but it also made me appreciate being a woman in America. Though we still have many barriers to overcome in a male-dominated society, this book was a real eye-opener as to how woman are treated in countries that are driven by male dominance.
Honor Lost has made me aware of a crime that I had no idea exists in modern times. Honor killings should be considered a felony and should be protested by free women over the would. I cannot imagine how difficult it must be for generations of women to be continually persecuted in the name of honor and religion. Khouri's explanation of the fear and humiliation young women of Jordan face under the thumb of the father brings the face of deception in this "free" country to light and brings the definition of freedom to question. How can we let this tragedy continue?
Rating: 
Summary: This book is not all what it seems!
Review: May I contribute as a Jordanian mother? When my husband and I read the book, our first reaction was revulsion at how the poor Dalia died. We will NEVER treat our two daughters that way. And, yes, we are practicing Muslims. Our religion is not -as the author put it- a 'dictatorship'! Once the initial shock passed, I began to realise that this book is not all what it seems. Hence this review, for your kind attention, which can be encapsulated in three major points. They relate to the author's writing formula, to the fact that -even when not in love with Michael- Dalia had still to see him and finally, to my surprise, to an important fact that has escaped all of your reviewers' attention so far: the claim that Dalia and Michael wanted to flee Jordan. /FIRST POINT/ To appeal to the Western readers, the author managed successfully to fudge the difference between 'Dalia dying for loving Michael' and 'Dalia dying for being suspected of loving Michael'. She also 'transplanted' Dalia's story into a WESTERN context THEN narrated it from a WESTERN viewpoint to guarantee the success of her book. It is undoubtedly a very intelligent writing technique BUT very misleading! Because Dalia did NOT live in the West. She lived in the Arab Muslim/Christian society of Jordan IN the Middle East. Once this fact remembered, the book loses its apparent Western coherence. /SECOND POINT/ By reading the book, through MIDDLE EASTERN eyes, the emerging conclusion is that Dalia and Michael were NOT in love, when she died. Indeed, in our culture, loving couples do NOT date for months on end BEFORE marriage; I married my husband within FIVE months. So, the length of Dalia and Michael 'relationship' till she died (14 months) is -to any person aware of Middle Eastern way of life- the CLEAR PROOF that, by procrastinating, they were STILL wary of each other's intentions.
I imagine I am not the first reader to reach such a conclusion so I won't dwell on it any longer. My sole aim -in this second point- therefore is to explain, AS A JORDANIAN, WHY Dalia STILL kept seeing Michael, despite not loving him. To a Jordanian, the explanation is very simple: Dalia did NOT want to hurt the feelings of the author because they were friends, 'sisters' and business partners. The author states in her book that she spent time and energy devising ways to bring Dalia and Michael together. When a close friend becomes one's matchmaker, so intently, it is VERY DIFFICULT to opt out. One goes along with it, if only to please his/her friend. I am sure millions of single people are DAILY put in that awkward situation by well-meaning matchmaking friends. I was MYSELF put, so often, in that embarrassing position when I was single. YOU WANT TO SAY 'NO THANKS' BUT YOU CANNOT. That was Dalia's situation: She carried on seeing -innocently- Michael because she could not bear hurting the feelings of her friend/sister who volunteered as her matchmaker. Dalia, on her own, would have seen Michael only a customer. /THIRD POINT/ It pertains to the claim that Dalia and Michael were planning to move abroad to get married - it is not only IMPLAUSIBLE but also, time-wise, IMPOSSIBLE. Implausible, because Dalia was a practicing Muslim whilst Michael was/is a Catholic. Impossible, because when Dalia died in 1996, according to the book, it took Michael NO LESS THAN FOUR YEARS to get the author an exit visa to Greece then Australia, to escape from a PENDING DEATH THREAT emanating from a source VERY close to her: her OWN family!! So are we to believe that Dalia and Michael would have gone seeing each other for FOUR to FIVE years MINIMUM, before escaping to the West, WITHOUT being discovered by Dalia's family? IMPOSSIBLE!! Most probably, Dalia would have married a fellow Muslim, well before then. My last words are for Dalia: 'God Bless you dear sister - May you rest in peace'.
Rating: 
Summary: A Christian Verdict: An Embarrassingly ill-informed book.
Review: I am a 'Western' Catholic man living in Jordan. Quite honestly, coming from a fellow Catholic, this book is an embarrassment. I can hardly recommend it to my Muslim friends. Even the most open-minded of them will be upset by its content. It is so inaccurate and unfair towards the culture and religion of my Muslim friends. For someone whose 'sister' was Dalia, a Muslim, the author's lack of Islamic facts and knowledge is shocking. Some sections of her book could have been written by zealots from the Spanish inquisition. It is so hurtful to Dalia's memory who was Muslim. For a start, honour killings are NOT a Muslim phenomenon, they happen worldwide. For example, throughout the Muslim world, people believe that Princess Diana was killed in Paris because she loved a Muslim: Dodi El Fayed. Should we then classify her death as an honour killing? This book is going to stir (and of course exploit) anti-Islamic feelings in the West. Paradoxically, in the Muslim world, anti-Christian feelings will be stirred too. 7/ If I, as a practicing Catholic living in Jordan, cannot believe entirely the events of this book leading to the death of Dalia, how can the author expect the Muslims worldwide to believe it and join her in a crusade against honour killings? This book has disappointed me greatly and has not done Dalia justice... For a more objective study of honour killings, WORLDWIDE, you are better off using the internet. I was amazed by the quantity and quality of the data I gathered from various websites. Finally, although I am a Catholic and Dalia was a Muslim, I feel compelled to say:
'Bless her soul, dear Lord, for she has been wronged!' I may be biased-I give this book 2 stars to encourage my fellow Christian author to show more objectivity in her future writings.
Rating:
Summary: A Critical Muslim Review of 'Honor Lost'
Review: I am a Muslim who once fell foul of our 'traditions' which are alien to Islam. So I was eager to read Norma's book who also lost her friend Dalia to traditions. But, sadly, I feel disappointed. I couldn't recognise the society I was born into, in her book. By seeking 'revenge' and the Western readership, self-consistency, accuracy and objectivity were discarded: Dalia's tragic life has been so 'westernised' that it reads -sometimes- like a Middle-Eastern Mills & Boon saga! Even as a Muslim, it was hard for me to peel off its thick Western makeup to evaluate its content thoroughly. Within less than 1000 words, I'll raise only 5 illustrative points, with no spoilers. First, Norma and Dalia grew up TOGETHER in the same society. So when Norma says she was helping match Dalia with Michael, didn't she realise she was unwittingly putting Dalia in harm's way? Dalia's demise was so predictable! Does Norma feel blameless? Did the Catholic affinity between Norma and Michael play a role? How crucial was Norma's involvement and matchmaking? Secondly, we are told Michael 'courted' Dalia for more than a year at HER OWN RISK. If he loved her THAT MUCH, why didn't he embrace Islam and marry her? He would NOT have been the first convert in Jordan which is a man's world where -also- being an army officer counts! Actually, an English friend embraced Islam to marry his Muslim love: such cases are becoming common! Dalia would be ALIVE TODAY if Michael did so, but he didn't! This 'relationship' looked more like a platonic friendship from HIS part. Thirdly, to promote the book, a Sunday magazine published a photo of Dalia and Norma that casts serious doubts on crucial events. What struck me -apart from her arresting beauty- is Dalia wearing HIJAB, the religious scarf worn by practicing Muslim women (Norma confirmed it). One of my sisters wears hijab so I know its significance. As anyone acquainted with Islam knows (Muslim or otherwise, including Norma therefore), by wearing hijab, Dalia's message was clear: To her, ALLAH was her ULTIMATE choice in her life, above all people (including her family) and in all matters (including love and marriage); hence her 5 daily prayers and her intact virginity. We practicing Muslims do not believe in extra-marital sex or marry outside our faith. So, to please Allah, she could NOT have married Michael UNLESS he embraced Islam, even if her parents allowed it. Their mixed marriage is contrary to whom Dalia wanted to please by wearing hijab: GOD NOT MICHAEL! Therefore no 'love conquers all' from HER part, either! Where does this 'forbidden love' come from then? Fourthly, an example of how Western makeup was applied to Dalia's story: after her death, Norma asked Michael if Dalia was still a virgin. Such a question is unimaginable because Dalia was a devout Muslim and Norma KNEW that, since she was her LONG-LIFE friend and 'sister'. It seems, to 'spice up' her book for the Western market, she has ended up insulting Dalia's memory, thereby negating her book's declared aim: To avenge Dalia. Finally, the other publicised point is: Dalia died because she 'dared to love a Christian'. Yet the book itself led me to believe otherwise.
Indeed, excluding rape, honour killings happen for ONE reason: When the daughter defies her parents' will and acts on her own accord. Whether this defiance is real or imaginary is irrelevant-all what is needed for murder is a suspicious and paranoid mind. At home, I heard of such murders: A father chose for his daughter a husband but she refused him as she loved someone else, so he killed her for 'shaming' him. He was jailed, quite rightly! She was killed despite the fact her choice and her father's are BOTH Muslims. PERSONALLY, I lost my first love because she was forced to marry her cousin to whom she was 'promised' at birth. Yet again, her family, her cousin and I are ALL Muslims. So, bearing in mind what I know about my society of origin (similar to Dalia's), what happened to me and finally the book content itself, I have to conclude Dalia was not killed because Michael was Christian but mainly because she didn't tell her family about her innocent friendship with him; which became consequently in her father's paranoid mind a full-blown 'love story' he did NOT sanction BEFOREHAND for HIS daughter.
If Michael's religion were the issue, Norma's Christian parents would have taken offence and protected their daughter. Yet, to launch the book, so much has been made of Norma threatened by her OWN family for shaming them before Dalia's family! Consequently, Michael's Christianity was a far lesser concern than the MAJOR social crime of a daughter (Christian or Muslim) acting independently behind her family's back. THIS IS WHY DALIA DIED AND NORMA WAS THREATENED FOR THE SAME REASON: THEIR FATHERS' TRUST SEEMED BETRAYED! Ironically, if Dalia's family hated Christians, she would be ALIVE TODAY: They allowed her -with the Catholic Norma- to run a salon where unknowingly her fate was sealed. In truth, a book about Dalia dying 'for loving a Christian' appeals to the West BUT one about her dying for disobeying her father doesn't. The winning commercial formula is obvious: it relies on the anti-Islamic prejudices and ignorance of the secular AND religious West. Yet, 2 out the 4 participants in this tragedy are Christians! The trumpeted 'forbidden love' story construed, out of an innocent friendship, is a needed red herring and Western market ploy! But to someone, like me, born into and victim of Dalia's world too, this book simply DOESN'T stand scrutiny. As Dalia cannot comment, it would be enlightening to read Michael's version of the events.
Rating:
Summary: Unreal
Review: This book was a true enlightenment for this rather sheltered American. I'm afraid I was under the impression that women in todays world had as much freedom as I do... to live their life as they choose and make their own decisions. How wrong I was! Norma has a horrific and frightening story to tell. My only quesiotn is this, how can others help? What can be done to change the tide for the betterment of all Arab women? It's well wrth reading, then pass it on.
Rating:
Summary: A MUST READ
Review: The tragic and haunting events retold by Ms. Khouri are astounding. I cried while reading and have been moved like I never have before by a book. I applaud the author for having the courage and desire to make her story known. Read this if you at all care about the quality of human life.
Rating:
Summary: Compelling*Tragic*Tribute
Review: What a narrow perspective we have in the western world! My teenaged daughter has no idea of the freedom of today's American women. Yes, our society is not perfect but the bondage is not as acute as the one described in Honor Lost. Keywords: Honor crime, women's issues, Arab culture, human rights.
Rating:
Summary: Disturbing
Review: This is a very disturbing book; reading it made me feel physically ill. Besides telling the story of her friend who was brutally stabbed a dozen times by her father for going on a few dates with a man she loved, the author relates how thousands of women are murdered by their male relatives each year in Jordan. Some women are murdered because they were raped, some murdered because of rumors, and some, authorities suspect, were murdered to keep them from inheriting property or money. The "men" who commit these crimes go free shortly thereafter because killing one's daughter or sister is just a misdemeanor in Jordan. The author tells us that "honor" murders predate Islam and Christianity, but that there are verses in the Koran which are used to justify such murders. She also says that honor murders occur in both Christian and Muslim families, because the practice is actually an "Arab" custom. Khouri makes Jordan sound like a concentration camp where women are the Jews and men are the Nazi commandants, able and willing to intimidate and kill without fear of any punishment. At the end she tells us that there are people working to get the laws changed, but after so many centuries, this deeply rooted "misdemeanor" will not easily be extinguished. A must-read for HUMANS everywhere! Let's hope this book does for the women of Jordan (and other Arab nations where "honor" murders also occur) what "Uncle Tom's Cabin" did for slaves in the U.S. in the 19th century. I find it very interesting that the majority of the negative reviews of this book are written in the same format: doublespaced paragraphs of 1-3 sentences intermittently punctuated by words in ALL CAPS !!! ...kinda makes it look like they are all being written by the same person ; )
Rating:
Summary: ...chilling account
Review: I would like to express to Miss Khouri how moved I was by her reading last evening at Barnes and Noble in NYC. I was almost brought to tears during the chilling account of her last moment with Dalia. I was touched by her love for her friend. The somber sound of her voice and emotions while reading left me filled with grief and thoughts of those who I love dearly. It makes her story all the more tragic in realizing that finding love for another person in this world is rare and having it taken away in this manner is an atrocity. I think her bravery to appear in public with this story is a testament of her love for Dalia and belief that change must occur. When she exclaimed that is a dream for her to one day return to Jordan, I realized the seriousness of her actions in writing this book. I believe that slavery comes in many forms. However Miss Khouri's book reveals that the common shackles of slavery, among all forms, is the control of someone else's thoughts and feelings. I hope Dalia's story is taken seriously by the world and results in a consorted effort to address the generations of men who are caging their wives, daughters and sisters with this antiquated and perverse way of thinking. I wish her luck on her journey.
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