Home :: Books :: Health, Mind & Body  

Arts & Photography
Audio CDs
Audiocassettes
Biographies & Memoirs
Business & Investing
Children's Books
Christianity
Comics & Graphic Novels
Computers & Internet
Cooking, Food & Wine
Entertainment
Gay & Lesbian
Health, Mind & Body

History
Home & Garden
Horror
Literature & Fiction
Mystery & Thrillers
Nonfiction
Outdoors & Nature
Parenting & Families
Professional & Technical
Reference
Religion & Spirituality
Romance
Science
Science Fiction & Fantasy
Sports
Teens
Travel
Women's Fiction
I Hate You, Don't Leave Me : Understanding the Borderline Personality

I Hate You, Don't Leave Me : Understanding the Borderline Personality

List Price: $6.99
Your Price: $6.29
Product Info Reviews

<< 1 2 3 4 .. 6 >>

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Don't pick this as your first BPD book!
Review: I am Patty Pheil of Borderline Personality Disorder Today. This book, as far as I know is the first book about the BPD written for the consumer. The book in and of itself is excellent and filled with good information. However, many borderlines have felt suicidal after reading this book if this is the first book they read about the BPD. Why? Simply because this book was written awhile back before much was known about how certain medications can be extremely helpful with many of the BPD symptoms such as rage, depression, mood swings, etc. Therefore the book was written with good information but the aspect of hope and recovery is not in this book. One feels hopeless after reading this book. This was the first book I read about the BPD and that is how I felt - more disturbed and hopeless. This is not the author's fault however. He simply wrote the book at a time where there wasn't much known about treatment. It would be great to have this great information along with the new drug treatment in a new edition.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: Great book for its time but outdated and needs updating
Review: Borderline personality disorder has levels of prevalence, social dysfunction, health care utilization, and chronicity that make its public health significance similar to that of other major psychiatric disorders such as schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, or major depression, yet it has not received comparable attention.

This was one of the first books offered to the broader public, and as such deserves its place in the BPD literature.

Borderline personality disorder often leaves those who become intimately involved feeling guilty, helpless, and like they have personally failed. For an excellent example of this sense captured in a book, read Walker's THE SIREN'S DANCE: MY MARRIAGE TO A BORDERLINE, which also has clinical appendices discussing DBT, etc.

Both of these books will give the reader a great understaning of this very complicated and hard to treat condition.

Rating: 4 stars
Summary: Good read for non-BPDer
Review: I like non-fiction books. I received this paper back edition as a gift from an acquaintance. I never knew about the disorder before receiving the book. After reading it, I was motivated to look the illness up on a medical search engine. I learned there has been research done recently testing a medication for it and that there are certain neurological abnormalities in the body of a sufferer. I can say with confidence that this book is a good read for a non-BPDer.

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Satisfactory, But Too Outdated
Review: If you are someone with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), as I am, or you know someone who is, this book may be right for you. This was the first book I ever read on the subject and, at the time, it provided some good information. However, now there are so many better choices to tell you what you want to know about this condition.

This book covers things such as: diagnoses that are similar to BPD, information on the symptoms as defined in the DSM-IV, available therapy, and information on how to deal with borderlines. Copywritten in 1989, this book doesn't even mention Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), the latest "craze" in therapy for borderlines, and treats many issues as if we were still living in 20th century. The list of psychotropic drugs in the back is greatly outdated as well. In general, you will get a whole lot more out of the newer texts than wasting your time on this sometimes hard to read book.

Recommended only if you've already exhausted your other options.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: The Best Book On This Issue
Review: I Hate You, Don't Leave Me : Understanding the Borderline Personality is by far the best book on this issue, which is why I list this book on my website as a must read. Worth your money... worth your time.
Rick Goodner, Author of "Co-dependent... What a Bore and Other Clinical Observations"

Rating: 2 stars
Summary: Dispassionate, Discouraging and Incomplete
Review: The difference between a 'qualified' psychologist/clinician and a truly helpful one is the ability to listen well enough to understand what's happening uniquely INSIDE, not just outside, and to pragmatically approach both the inner and outer dysfunction with common sense and compassion. This book describes the theoretical and behavioral frameworks of BPD without ever truly touching the inner reality of this condition, and, as has been pointed out elsewhere, presents BPD as a nearly hopeless condition with a high mortality rate.

I Hate You Don't Leave Me is a caricature of the BPD sufferer and the illness itself and I believe lends itself to creating more of a divide between the person with the illness and the loved one who reads it with its tendency to objectify the person with BPD. For the BPD sufferer, as someone else pointed out, this book is potentially very destructive to read.

I fervently wish I could recommend another book on BPD for you but the fact of the matter is, there has yet to be written a definitive, practical and compassionate guide to this consuming disorder. As someone who has more than 20 years experience with BPD, I will say that love, patience, telling the truth and gentle boundary setting are very good beginnings on the road to recovery.

It has been written that there are some people who 'outgrow' BPD in their 30s and 40s, however, while the symptoms may diminish in intensity, the perceptual inaccuracies and emotional/behavioral maladaptions continue to affect the quality of life for the BPD sufferer and her or his loved ones until/unless they are directly addressed.

If you are considering treatment options, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy both in individual and group settings may be an excellent place to start. For an idea of what DBT looks like, read Marsha Linehan's skills manual.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy may be helpful for the non-BPD sufferer coping with the stress of living with a loved one with BPD--and potentially helpful medications exist now that simply weren't around when I Hate You...Don't Leave Me was written.

A good firsthand account of successful recovery is I'm Not Supposed To Be Here (which I don't believe is available through Amazon at this time).

Whatever may be happening - don't give up on yourself or your loved one.

Rating: 3 stars
Summary: A GREAT INTRODUCTION TO BPD
Review: I was so confused, wondering what was wrong with me. I was told I wasn't good enough. I went to therapy trying to find out what was wrong with me. My therapist finally told me my wife was manic depressive but I was okay, only angry about being verbally and emotionally abused for years. I still didn't understand. Years later, I discovered an affair, then another and another. As I reviewed our past, I discovered I lived in denial and failed to recognize my wife's manipulations and how she hid her affairs. The discovery was shocking. I was totally confused. I couldn't make any sense out of it. What was going on? This book helped me understand. I became more aware. I was a co-dependent to a BPD. The book helped me cope through the SET principle, but had mixed results with her because Borderlines question empathic words. A great introductory book to become more aware. Learning more about BPD isn't as important as learning to deal with it on a daily basis with loved ones.

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Thankful
Review: Recently I was given this book to read, I HATE YOU,DON'T LEAVE ME and the week after bought NIGHTMARES ECHO by Katlyn Stewart. Between the two books I have come to understand so much about the past that has haunted me due to abusive family life. I believe I can begin to heal in a way I never thought would be possible for me. If you can, read both books together. You will find a sense of healing. Melissa

Rating: 5 stars
Summary: Intense
Review: Excellent explanation of a familiar behavior pattern and lifestyle causing total chaos and impossibility in relationships. Intense is what you wanted -- right?

Rating: 1 stars
Summary: Don't Read
Review: There are several problems with this book.
1 - Extremely outdated
2 - Gives the impression that people with BPD are hopeless
3 - Very disocouraging reading for anyone with BPD
4 - Kreisman isn't the BPD expert he makes himself out to be, trust me, I've met him before.


<< 1 2 3 4 .. 6 >>

© 2004, ReviewFocus or its affiliates