His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage

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Summary: Important news for couples who want lasting love!
Review: Harley's book is an excellent source for couples at any stage in their marriage. If you want an understanding of the root issues that can lead to affairs and ultimately divorce and how to deal with them, you need to read this book. If you apply the principles set forth in Harley's book you will see a remarkable difference in your marriage in a wide variety of areas. In a time where couples choose divorce as an answer to problems this book will be of great benefit.

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Summary: Awesome!
Review: This book is wonderful. I borrowed it from a friend. Now I am buying it for myself so that I can read it again and again and I can lend it to others. I would recommend it for all couples, married and unmarried. No matter how long they've been together. Anyone can learn from it. Totally eye-opening!

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Summary: Good for whom?
Review: Not withstanding the substantial benefit of insight gained through paying attention to your partner's perceived needs, Dr. Harley lists basic needs that are entirely too one-sided. Just one question: Why are all the men's responsibilities fun and the woman's duties chores? Ah, yes, the man NEEDS a nymphomaniac housekeeper to keep him from straying. I think I might choose playing games with the family over plastic surgery. Hmmm.

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Summary: Great For Reading to Each Other
Review: My wife and I started reading this book together before we got married and we still love to take it on trips. I drive, she reads and we often stop and ask each other "...is that really how you feel about that topic?" The most important thing we have found about the book is that the author's treatment of the subject is not to stereotype a man or woman, but to emphasize that each person is different. That is to say, each person has a different priority of needs. We also found that those needs priorities have changed over the past five years of marriage. My recommendation is that this book needs to be read by all persons who are engaged to be married, and it needs to be taken on the honeymoon. Take the tests at the end of the book, answer all the questions at the end of each chapter and take full advantage of this valuable resource.

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Summary: Over 25 years of experience? Wow!
Review: I love the fact that this book is based on Dr. Harley's 25+ years of counseling experience and not from someone's fly-by-night, times-have-changed, I'm-the-exception perspective. Dr. Harley points out that the basic rule of staying in love is meeting each others needs. Do our needs change? Yes. But, the rule stays the same.

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Summary: So All Women Think Alike?????
Review: The generalizations in "His Needs/Her Needs" remind me of that all too famous book "Men Are From Mars & Women Are From Venus" as though it is normal or expected that all or most women need cattle prodding and romance to be interested in sex.If these authors would give some thought to the way women have been socialized to be repressive of sexual desires maybe they would stop seeing this as an innately female problem and see how socialization plays a part in women's seemingly lack of desire.. when one thinks about how women are brought up to view sex,one can see how sexual martial inequalities in sexual interest come about. ...men are brought up to see sex as a release, positive...while women are told it's something to use to get that all needed love...women are told that love is what they want and men are told sex is what they want...so you get extreme differences in behaviors..but the public keeps buying into all the old myths and another fortune is made selling generalizations and sexism.Many women also do not marry sexually desirable men,so lack of interest prevails. I find the book to be offensive,especially where it is stated that women must look good for their husbands...so what about men...I want a man that looks good to me.

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Summary: As good as it gets
Review: To Dr. Harley, thank you very much. This is the step by step, "How to" book on keeping a marriage intact.

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Summary: It has already worked
Review: My wife and I started to read the book together and put it into action. One month later it has improved our life together. I would recomend it to everyone wanting to make a difference.

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Summary: Excellent book.
Review: Excellent book! I wish someone had given a copy to us as wedding present 13 years ago. Accurate and very specific strategies are given. The wisdom and truths in this book are worth sharing them with your married friends.

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Summary: Advice that is practical and possible to carry out.
Review: We received this book as a wedding gift the day before we were married - how to affair proof our marriage? What an odd choice. It's now our favourite wedding gift to give to friends. Even though we first read the book 10 years ago, the content is simple and memorable enough that we still refer to it's content often. As my husband prepares for the ministry, we will be sure to keep one copy in the parsonage and one in the study.